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Perimenopause & Menopause

Hey there Sister, 

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I am 51 years old, and in the full swing of Perimenopause. I have been travelling this journey probably like most women, as of the age of 40. For most this Journey towards the honorable Crone Status starts around 35-40. 

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On this page I will mention several modalities, recources, strategies, supplements, books, and my own experiences so you can choose and see what works for you. This is not just a Physical journey, it is a deeply Emotional and Spiritual one as well. 

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I have several friends whom are going through this as well, and if there is one standard question that ALWAYS pops up, it is: "What do I want to do with the rest of my Life?" or "What do I want now?" or "What is missing in my life that I need to fullfil my Hearts Desire?". In other words, a Deeply Personal Question about Who you Are, Whom you want to be, What you don't want anymore, and What you are Choosing for YOU now... What is it? What makes this come up now? 

The Crone Phase is the NO BULLSHIT PHASE of our life. It is a phase where we are confronted with ourselves, and where stuff that we still haven't processed or digested, will come up now. Anger is often an emotion that comes to the surface and she's gonna want to be heard. If we have put others first and ourselves often last, that will come up to and this patterns wants to change! If we've had kids, they're most likely off an doing their own thing, or are about to, and the 'empty nest' feeling will bring up our deepest desires, even if we don't know what they are yet. Kids or no kids, business or no business, YOU are being asked 'what you want now'. If we've wanting to start something, or create something but never had the time or energy to do so, this may pop up now.

 

When we enter this phase, and when we start to stop bleeding, our body starts to preserve this precious Energy and she wants to do something else! And boy are we confronted with this powerful Fire Energy that comes from our Heart and Womb, and when we listen, when we ask "what do you need?" - answers will come... Womb and heart work are in my opinion essential to this process. 

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And for many, we get many physcial issues as well. More joint pain, foggy mind, insomnia, a more dry vagina/vulva, shrinking of our labia, breast/nipple pain, womb and even clitoral adhesions. More peeing, or more UTI's... mood swings? Ha hell yes! But, many of these symptoms are able to be balanced by eating right, exercising right, working on a good sleep routine, and using hormones. Yes, Hormones! CRUCIAL for all of the above issues I just mentioned, and I will go into it more below. I will also tap into the Sexual Part of this Journey and how we can keep things Juicy.

 

Also, Integral Pelvic Therapy is amazing for us Crone Ladies! YES! We want to keep our vulva and vagina in good health as we grow wiser, and we also want to make sure we get the right support. And as I am going through this phase as well, that means I REALLY understand what you are talking about! 

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For now, know you are not alone. Know that I can support you, and know that it is a beautiful phase of our life, because the 'no bullshitter' and the 'fierce couragous woman' that is inside all of us, is ready to come out! So let's make sure we support her in full Glory!

Hormones
 
Hormone Therapy has gotten a really bad rep over the last 20 years. This is very very unfortunate, especially
because it is at the detrement of our health and wellbeing. There are several studied published and there is more
and more data out there that confirmes that vaginal estrogen cream, and (B)HRT (Bio Identical Hormone
Replacment Therapy) are SAFE ways to balance out your system. Especially vaginal estrogen cream are a must
for every women over 40. Dr. Kelly Casperson Md, has a website dedicated to vulvar health, and here is
more info as to why vaginal estrogen cream (and Dhea cream) are safe.
Click here for more info.

I use BHRT from Dr. Michelle Sands, ND, and have been over a year. I have far less moodswings, more energy, sleep better, no more breast pain, and feeling overall more balanced. When my vagina gets dry or I forget it for a few days, I immediately put estrogen cream on there, and a few days later the symptoms are gone.  I am on her monthly Hormone Club, where I get saliva tested every 4 months, more if needed, and then get unlimited access to a nurse to go over any issues I may still have. Then we adjust the topical hormone cream pumps to the desired need based on my symptoms and my age. The key is to find the right balance of estrogen and progesteron (and testosterone) based on YOUR needs. There is no 'ideal level' - as this will vary for each woman. So based on your levels, your symptoms and your desired outcome, the hormones are dosed.

Know that when we are using vaginal estrogen cream, it is a very LOW dose, and therefor it does not affect the overall estrogen levels in your body, and so it is very safe. Yes, also for women whom have had cancer, vaginal estrogen cream is in general SAFE.
However, always check with your Dr. or your Obgyn. When looking for an Obgyn, look for the abbreviation: MSCP (Menopause Society Certified Practitioner), or NCMP (National Certified Menopause Practitioner). Or for FACOG (Fellow of the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, this means the Dr. has been keeping up with the latest developments in Women's health). 

The reason we want to use vaginal estrogen cream, is because our vulva/vagina is a hormone receptor site. There are actually many hormonal receptor sites in our body, but our vulva/vagina is a crucial one for us women. So when we apply 1 pump 2-3 times a week (for the rest of your life, yes!) you can prevent many many issues along your Crone Menopause Journey.

Issues such as: dryness, urinary frequency, uti's, incontinence, pain during sex (often due to dryness or atrophy of vagina/entrance/labia), pain, clitoral adhesions, osteoporotic fractures, diabetes, heart disease, etc. can all be prevented by using estrogen. You can use it vaginally to prevent vulvar and bladder issues, or in conjunction with topical estrogen or patches. Discuss with your Dr. what is needed for you.  

Below Links for your info and convenience: 
BHRT Hormone Club: click here for more info
Order Vaginal Estrogen from Dr. Casperson here
Order Bio Identical Vaginal Estrogen from Dr. Sands here
Order Bio Identical DHEA Cream from Dr. Sands here

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Food 
I don't like the word 'diet'. As it feels limiting and constrictive and as if you're on some sort of 'plan'. However, what you eat always matters, and especially when entering menopause. Below are some tips for eating in such a way it helps us metabolize better, and feel like we don't need to snack the whole either. 
TIPS: 

  • Try to eat 20-30 grams of protein with each meal. Every meal should sustain you for about 4 hours. Want to eat sooner, you probaly didn't get enough protein.  

  • Try to prevent as many glucose spikes as possible. They help prevent you from overeating and also balancing out your hormones better. Yuo can prvetn this by drinking some apple cider vinegar in some water right before a meal, and/or eat something green first before you eat your meal. This creates ttle 'coating' in your intestinal lining, and so can prevent bloating and also glucose spikes. Get the book "Glucose Goddess" by Jessie Inchauspe, or her cookbook "The GlucoseGoddess Method". Lots more advise in her books, or follow her on instagram. Also she recommends you eat your food as much as possible in the following order: Veggies first, then Protein and fats, and then starches and sweet last. This order creates the most balanced effect on your body and digestion. Also, go for a walk for 10 min within a 90 min window after your meal. This fires up the muslces and so fires up metabolism and lowers glucose spikes also.

  • ​​Be sure to get enough Magnesium. Here are some tips in chosing which magnesium would suit you best: 









     

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Spiritual  

When we enter the Crone Phase, we feel a lot of things happening to us. We often also start wondering and questioning, but also reflecting on how our life has been, and if there are things we'd have done differently, or are wanting to do so now. Also, our body is changing so much. Our hair structure gets to be different, our discharge may change, our muslces and joints start to ache more, our mind may tend to get more foggy (remember using BHRT can tremendously support in all this!!), our sex drive seems to have taken a long hike, and our vagina feels dry and sex may hurt. Sometimes we feel like we're losing our minds, literally, and it may be a time where we may want to be alone, or go do things we never did before. Or we may not want anything to change at all, and we reluctantly enter this phase feeling unsupported and misunderstood. The western medicine is not so equipped in helping us (though this is changing thank God,dess ) and Women Dr. Pioneers are changing the narrative, I do believe we do not need to suffer. Yes, I say it again, we do NOT need to suffer. Using hormones, eating right, focussing on sleep, and using lubricants (more on sex below), are all ways we can support ourselves. 

And on a deep spiritual level, it is a time to go within and start nurturing your intuitive side more and more. In the Taois Wisdom, menopause is called "The Second Spring". As it is considered a rebirth into a whole new chapter of a woman's life. It is completely different than how Western Medicine looks at it. Howerver, for a lot of us, this peri-menopausal phase, can feel very messy and disorienting and perhaps we feel we want to just 'break free' and 'damn it all', yet know, when we enter this phase consciously, we can come out of it very clearly. This time is a time for growth, on many levels. And when we take the time to go within, to feel, to connect with ourselves and our Hearts Desire, a lot of transformation can happen. One way to do this is also through Womb and Ovary work (even if those organs may not be there anymore). Our Womb and Ovaries are the Keepers of our Fire and Desire and what we want to put "out there"! So doing womb/ovary work, is a beautiful way to support yourselves and to get deeply in touch with your needs, desires and wishes. 

Society makes us feel 'old and disgarded', but oh are they wrong. We are no longer bleeding and this energy is now transformed and reused for us to determine what to do with this. We owe it to ourselves to find our Fire. To find what we love and want to do. To discover our deepest wishes and also what our fears are. When we discover what is or held us back, that is a key in discovering how to move that into something that is going to be truly supporitve to our most inner Feminine Creative Landscape. Movin into a new way of doing thigns. Allowing ourselves to feel and slow down, and say NO or YES ... Wehn we enter the Crone Phase we tend to become unapologetically honest or we feel the desire to be this honest, but we're scared to do so. Perhaps of what others may think of us, or simply because it is a new language we need to learn, and its scary! But once the truth of our desires and needs come out, trust me, we can try to shuff it away as long as we want, but when we hit 50 and above, it's gonna resurface again, and we need to be ready for it. Our VOICE wants to be HEARD, and we cannot deny her that Freedom!!

Doing Inner work, Pelvic Bowl work, supporting yourself with nourishing food, learning about ways to maintaing a good sleep routine, exercising the right way for our bodies and age, understanding that there may be ups and downs, and that there are ways to get through this in a way that is doable and even fun and good, all support you on an emotional and spiritual level as well. We are not just the body. We are so much more.

Make sure you talk to other women also! Let's break the taboo about what we're going through. Let's Grow Together! Always feel free to email me with questions or suggestions. I would love to hear them. For me this journey has been one of deep reflection and also searching and somewhere simply not believing that we are meant to suffer through menopause. Did you know that some cultures don't even have a word for Menopause? It doesn't exist. And I think this is partly due to the fact that Women in those cultures are seen as Queens and Wise Women. They are honored and revered. And that is how it should be! We've got a mega ton of life experience and we will not be cast aside! 

Exercise

When we get to be around 40-45 and up, we need to start exercising differently. Our bodies store fat, often in our tummies, but when we exercise too much or get to be too long in a stress state from exercising, this raises our cortisol levels, and that creates a desire to eat more food, often not the best ones, and that turns into fat. For us exercise is all about the right kind, and less is more. I go to the gym, and i'm there for about 20-30 min. And what I focus on is weights and walking. Those are my main forms of exercise. I don't do HIIT, I don't do aerobics, I do weights and walking. 

We need to do weights at least 2-3 a week. And we need to build it up slowly, and add more weight each time we feel we can do more. Find a routine that works for your whole body, switch it up for muscle groups, hire a Menopause Informed trainer, and use the weights and each time go to that point where you feel you can't do an other one. And that is the point where you've given your body a clue you're getting stronger and building more muscle.

WHY WEIGHTS? Because weights pull our muscles and tendons, and that is good for our bones and strength of our bones. Creating more muscle also makes for a better metabolism, which is what we want, because when we age, our metabolism slows down. We want to do weights also because we want to be strong! We want to be able to get older and still be able to bend easily, pick up stuff, be able to walk well, move around as agile and best as we can. And weights help with this. And it doesn't have to be a 2 hour routine. 20-30 min is fine!

So enjoy this routine! As for Mindfullness, add some Yoga, walking, swimming, breathwork and meditation to your daily routine so you address all parts of your being, as we are not just working with the physical, but also the emotional, mental and spiritual parts of our Being.

Sexual

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